Murderous Love
by PinkPJ's
Summary: Check out the REWRITE - The Beginnings Of All Ends please. With the struggle of a new life will she discover things better left uncovered? Will she learn secrets about her family, will they be as innocent as she thought they were? 1700's new summary
1. Preface

Preface

this is my first fanfiction and I hope you like it.

**Disclaimer:**** this is for the whole story. I DO NOT own any of these characters, I might get ideas from different places but the idea of this story is mine, everything else is not.**

**Preface**

I awoke screaming drenched with sweat. I sat for a moment trying to get my breathing and heart under control I thought back to the dream more like nightmare I had, had. I shuddered; this particular nightmare had kept me up for years. It haunted me, bringing back memories I would rather forget.

I will be out of town for awhile so please review and tell me what you think


	2. Chapter 1

**So I am so sorry for not updating sooner but like I said I was out of town and just got back less than an hour ago so here is the first chapter and there are probably plenty of mistakes, feel free to helpfully critique my work, and review I'm begging you. when I saw my reviews I couldn't stop smiling. They make me happy. So please review.**

**Chapter 1**

I woke up and smiled to myself. I had slept quite peacefully and was thinking and looking forward to the coming day.

You see my father is a merchant. Well one of his deals didn't turn out so well, and we lost the majority of our things, we really didn't have much left, but with the help of one of his friends Carlisle Cullen (my godfather), we hoped to be back in business.

Carlisle had insisted on helping my father, and a couple of weeks ago they had sent off a ship with cargo. It was in my father's best interest to send my brother Gabriel with the ship so that he could learn the business. Little did my father Charlie Swan know it would change our lives in a way we did not expect.

Carlisle's family has been merchants for generations and he felt an obligation to continue in this line of business despite the fact he wanted to be a doctor. He decided to make a compromise: he would sell herbs, spices, and so forth, and learn about how to use them as medicine.

I was sitting down to breakfast with my father when a loud and hurried knock filled the air, BANG, BANG, BANG. My father and I just looked at each other and I asked the first question that popped in my mind. "Who would be calling on us this early in the morning?"

My father just sat in silence looking at me for a moment before answering, "I have no idea. If you would excuse me Isabella I must get the door." Right before my father walked out he turned around and added, "Oh and Isabella please stay here until you are fit to be seen."

I just nodded my head to frustrated to argue with my father on calling me Isabella instead of Bella. After my father left I continued to eat my breakfast.

As I was heading up to my room I heard a cry of pain from my father's study that was down by the front door.

I turned around and began to fly down the stairs as quickly as possible. It was a terrible idea on my part since I literally flew down or more fell down them like a ball would.

I heard the cry again and got back up rushing again to my father thankfully not tripping the rest of the way. When I entered into the room I saw my father sitting at the desk with his head in his hands. He looked up and I thought he realized I was there until he was looking up at the ceiling and called out to know one in particular "NO, I don't believe this. I can't. Please, Don't let this be true."

When I heard this I knew something was wrong. I decided to make my presence known but when I called out to my father it was like he didn't hear me. I went up to him and gave him a hug. I looked down with disappointment when he didn't even acknowledge my presence. My gaze fell onto a piece of paper that I soon identified as a letter, I looked it over and saw that it had been crumpled and smoothed over again.

I picked it up and began to read.

6-6-1713Dear Mr. Charles Swan

_I am sorry you have only received this letter. I would have written sooner, but there were complications. I have some terribly grave news to tell you, and I suggest that you prepare yourself. _

_I am extremely and undeniably sorry to inform you that pirates attacked the ship "the Marriott." Everything was lost, including many lives, when the pirates attacked._

I stopped reading there and looked in my father's eyes and saw pits of desperation. I had realized when I read the last couple of lines it meant we had lost everything. I was sad about this, but why would my father go into shock about it? He knew from the beginning that it was a risk; it was a gamble. We would gain or lose everything. This and another question kept bouncing around in my head. Why wasn't Gabriel the one who was writing to father about this. I looked back down and realized that I still hadn't finished reading the letter. I quickly resumed reading.

_The pirates had set the boat on fire after they pillaged the ship. Gabriel was helping wounded men get into the long boat. On his way to bring another wounded sailor to the long boat a pirate that had been left for dead stabbed him in the back. He managed to make it into the long boat, but he died that night. He died a hero, saving others lives,_

I stopped there it couldn't be true Gabriel couldn't have died I looked down at the sheet and anxiously continued to read, determined to prove that it wasn't true.

_He died a hero, saving others lives; many people are indebted to him and are thankful for the actions he took. Before Gabriel died he asked me to personally tell you what happened, and that he loves you and your daughter very much, those were his last words. Again I am deeply sorry to be the one to tell you this. _

_ Sincerely,_

_ Captain Rodgers _

By the time I finished reading, I was numb, I wasn't thinking, and I didn't notice any of my surroundings, it felt like the world had stopped. Suddenly a thought slipped into my mind causing an invisible wall that was holding all thoughts broke open.

'It couldn't be true, Gabriel wasn't dead he couldn't be. He was my big brother always there for me. We were best friends. He was protective and he defended me when someone would try to hurt me. He would tease me but never let it get to far. He would never let any of his relationships get in the way of ours. He was the only man in my world; my father was gone for business quite a bit; and he always told me I was the only girl in his world, seeing as our mother had died from birth complications, neither of us got to know her. We were always there for one another, and now he had been torn away from me?'

Another hopeless thought came into my mind,

'Maybe it was a mistake and Gabriel was rushing home to tell us he was all right, that he would always be there for me.' I wished for that thought to be true but, deep down I knew it wasn't I knew that the letter contained the truth; I just wanted to hide from it.

Everything went from silent and still, to an abrupt shacking it felt like there was an earthquake going on. I felt two strong comforting strong arms wrap protectively around me and things began to still. After I could see things better I began to realize it was my body that was shaking, because I was sobbing so hard. I had to face the truth; my brother was dead.

I didn't cry after that I had become a shell of the person I was before I had to be strong for my father, who still wouldn't believe the news. He didn't do anything except wait for Gabriel's return. As the weeks passed we both began to lose hope. Eventually my father went into a depression that I couldn't help him with, without his choice and he refused. He didn't speak; he didn't eat; he didn't even sleep. It was terrible it was worse than how I had ended up.

**the date I used was random so yeah.**


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**Hey everyone, I'm so proud of myself I updated even with being extremely busy. Thank you for understanding and guess what my friend is back home and is walking again. I'm so happy that she is doing so much better. **

**I'm going to try to update once a week from now on, but I am really busy so I might not be able to. Anyways I hope you like this chapter, I'm honestly quite proud of it since I wrote it in about a day during school, and also because it was a pain in the butt. I had it all written out and decided I didn't like so I deleted it and rewrote it, and the other one took a long time to do to.  
**

**Enjoy.**

**Chapter 2**

It had been eight terribly long and lonely months since Gabriel's death I felt like I didn't have a reason to live. My father was in a depression and barely spoke to me. We had never had a close relationship, but what we had seemed to shred into a million pieces, he never looked me in the eyes anymore.

I became worried over my fathers health, and to distract myself. I would clean and make food for him to eat, he barely touched it but it kept me busy.

At the market, being my clumsy self I was looking down at my feet and ran straight into someone. I looked up to say my apology to be met with the face of a pixie like girl, who was already apologizing saying she wasn't looking where she was going. I learned her name was Mary Alice Brandon, but that she went by Alice. As cliché as this sounded we were best friends by the end of the day, she introduced me to her mother who she was there with and we decided to get together the next day.

For the first time in a long time I felt like there was a reason for me to live, I wanted try to be the best I could be again. Alice and I would get together almost every day now. Her mother Mrs. Brandon or Kathleen as she wanted me to call her came by with Alice determined to take care of me. She became a second mother to me and told me I was like a second daughter to her. Alice had been thrilled when the two of us got along well, and had been so happy she brought me window-shopping, and that was how I found myself outside a dress shop window-shopping with Alice.

When we were on our way back to my house I looked across the street to see my Aunt Esme. She wasn't my real aunt, but she was my godmother, and had acted as my mother since before I could remember I'm sure. I hadn't seen her in a while and decided to say hi to her I grabbed Alice's hand and said, "Wait Alice, I just saw my Aunt Esme, lets go say hi. I want you to meet her."

Alice replied by turning her head so fast to see where I was pointing I thought she would get whiplash, and before I realized it was dragging me over saying, "hurry up" Alice had heard about Esme in our conversations, and she had told me that she wanted to meet her. I caught up to Alice, laughing when I saw her trying to push her way through the crowd and see past them to see where Esme was, looking more carefully I realized it wasn't Esme she was following, I casually asked her, "Where are you going Alice?"

"I'm following Esme." She replied briskly whipping away the question I asked. I in turn asked another.

"And how do you plan to follow Aunt Esme if you've never seen her before?"

That stopped her in her tracks before she turned to me and asked "well I … alright where is she then." I raised my hand to point, my gaze and finger settling on Esme. Alice's eyes went to where I was starring and asked "The lady with the warm caramel colored hair?" In response I nodded my head, and before I knew it we were running over to Esme, or more Alice was running and dragging a stumbling me with her. With out any warning we suddenly stopped, Alice smoothed down her hair and dress while I was panting when Alice asked me "How do I look?"

"Wonderful as always" I panted out not even completely finishing my sentence, before I knew it Alice was gracefully walking over to Esme, I barely overheard the conversation but I did hear it. "Hi are you Esme Cullen? I'm Alice Brandon."

Esme responded slightly confused but warmly, "yes dear I am, do forgive me, do I know you?"

"Oh no you don't. I just have heard so much about you from my friend Bella and wanted to meet you that's all." Alice nodded and pointed towards me. Still panting I slowly made my way over to where they were. Esme nodded in understanding her warm smile growing even wider all traces of confusion fleeing.

"Well Alice it's very nice meeting you. I'm sorry I must say that I haven't heard anything about you."

"Oh well I just met Bella a week or so ago."

Esme nodded her head in understanding when I caught my breath I spoke, "Hello Aunt Esme,"

"Hello Bella, how have you been doing lately I haven't been able to see you for awhile."

Sensing what she was talking about I tried to smile, tears pricking at my eyes, when I answered truthfully. "I'm doing better now that I've met Alice, but I'm still lonely sometimes and miss Gabriel."

Esme and Alice both went up to hug me and it became a group hug. They just held me while I cried on the side of the street, when Esme asked, "Would you like to come back to my house for some tea, and muffins?"

I just nodded my head yes to her when Alice said, "Well I would like to come as well, but mother made me promise I'd be home earlier than usual to help her out."

Esme hurried to say, "Well than we'll walk you back, but you have to promise to come by my place to have tea, or just visit with us sometime soon."

Alice pretended to look deep in thought, having her hand up on her chin and pretending as if she was stroking a beard when she just quit and said, "If you'll have me I would love to."

"Of course we'll have you, when do think you will be able to come over?" We were walking now, and I was still trying to completely get a hold of myself, and only half listening.

"Well I better go inside I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Don't forget to invite your mother I would love to meet her."

"Of course."

When Alice was turning to enter the door, I grabbed her and gave her a hard hug that she quickly returned after the shock.

Mumbling into her shoulder I thanked her, "Thank you so much for being here for me after only knowing me a week or two."

She quickly whispered back to me, "Don't worry about it Bella. You are one of the best friends I have ever had, how could I not be there for you when you asked me to be. Besides what are friends for, if not just being there for someone else?"

When we heard a call from Alice's mother, she turned to the door, and called back, "I'll be right there Mum."

She turned back to us and said, "I best be getting in now, I'll see you both tomorrow then. Bye." Right before she disappeared into the house she turned to say good-by to us one last time.

As Esme was walking me home she asked me how things were going, and told me that she was always there for me. "Your like my daughter to me." Only this time out of the millions of times she had said that phrase I caught that there could be more of a meaning behind those words, from the pain I heard in her voice. Asking her this she sat me down next to the fire in the house. "Bella your right there is a double meaning behind those words. When I was 18 I got married to a wonderful young man, now understand that this was before I met Carlisle. Well I loved him; I guess you could say that he was my childhood sweetheart. Not even a year later we had a baby girl," tears were streaming down her face now, "her name was Margaret. She was sweet, and beautiful just like you, whenever I think of her I think of you as well. Margaret was only a little older than a year, I was 20 at the time, and an illness came over the town. My husband, baby girl, and myself all got sick, they both died and I felt like there was no reason to continue fighting the sickness until I met Carlisle, he helped me to see reason to continue fighting for life, I overcame it and eventually Carlisle and I fell in love. We were married a few years after this incident. When I met Carlisle he was still getting over his wife's death and taking care of his son Edward. Anyways that is all there is to it." Esme wiped the tears off of her cheek, while I asked a question I couldn't hold in any longer. "Do you miss them?"

Esme looked at me and without hesitation answered, "Of course I miss them. I still love them very much, but I love Carlisle as well, and I have you to help me deal with Margaret whether you know it or not. You are what I would've wanted her to be like."

Esme looked out the window, before she looked back saying, "Bella I'm always here for you. You know that right?" After I nodded my head she continued, " Alice is coming over here with her mother tomorrow around noon, as well as me so we can have tea, if you want we can stay here or go to my place. I have to go now before it gets any darker out or else Carlisle will worry, will you be alright?" At another nod of my head she hugged me whispering, "I love you, be careful." Before turning to go.

I'm not sure why but there must be a thing I have, waiting for the last second before I say anything I grabbed her hand and whispered back to her, "Esme, thank you for telling me. I love you to." I gave here a hug before adding when I looked out the window and saw that it was already dark, for her to be careful on her way back to her home.

**Hey again, so did you like it? I'll never know unless you tell me. Translation REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW. **

**It would mean a lot to me. Please criticize if you think it would help make the story better, but don't do it just to be rude please. **

**Oh yeah and go vote on my pole, I need to know who you think it should be for this story because, I can't decide.**

** Thanks**

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	4. Chapter 3

Sooo sorry for not updating when I said I would but the Internet got disconnected on my computer, and we just barely got it figured out. I'm also sorry for the confusion in the last chapter, but in my defense as I mentioned last time I did write it a lot faster than I normally do and I plan to fix it up when I can.

Now to get some things straight that I forgot to mention,

This is an All Human story

From the last chapter Alice wasn't following anyone important just some random person she thought _might_ be Esme.

Esme and Carlisle were both married before they met, and had a child. Carlisle and his wife had Edward, while Esme and her husband had Margaret. Carlisle's wife died from birth complications, Esme's husband and daughter died from an illness. A couple years later Esme and Carlisle got married. Edward is Carlisle's son and Esme is Edward's stepmother. (I just made up the pasts so yeah if you don't like it deal with it.)

Another thing I meant to tell you guys awhile ago is that in the first chapter Bella is 13 while Edward is around 14 almost 15 (neither of them had had their birthdays yet, so if you haven't figured it out chapter 2 Bella is 14 and Edward is 15 also it is 1714) So if it seems like I'm rushing in certain spots I'm sorry, just the majority of the main plot happens when they are from the ages of like 16-18 not quite sure but I do have to cover up a few points before then which I might rush a little bit.

So I think that's all the points I need to make clear right now. I hope you enjoy this chapter, sorry that it is so short. Again I honestly don't like it but I had lots of trouble writing it. Tell me what you think about it.

Chapter 3

It had been a few weeks since Alice and Esme had met in the market. Since that day Esme had joined Kathleen (Mrs. Brandon), and Alice to come visit me.

Every time Esme saw me she always asked how I was doing. I would reply with a simple, "I'm doing fine." It was clear on Esme's face that she did not believe what I said.

As the time went on I began to realize that Esme was watching me to see if I truly was all right. Not wanting to worry Esme with my state of depression over Gabriel's death I tried to put on a cheerful façade. Even with my effort I think that Esme saw write through it. I found the answer out when Esme was over one day to help me clean up the house. After a long fight Esme eventually won and I was sent to go and rest while she did the cleaning. **(I definitely do not like that paragraph but I can't find a way to word it that I like so…oh well I guess, moving on.)**

Esme approached me while I was sitting at the kitchen table relaxing with a cup of tea in hand

"Do you mind if I sit down?" she asked warmly.

I nodded my head and gestured for her to sit down with my hand while I replied with a, "Not at all. Would you like some tea?"

Smiling warmly she replied with small nod, "Yes please."

I backed out of my seat and went to fetch the kettle on the stove. I brought it back over and saw Esme thinking, I quietly made the tea for her the way I knew she liked it and sat back down to wait patiently for her to organize her thoughts.

After a few minutes she looked back at me, "Bella tell me, how are you really doing?" seeing me about to respond Esme quickly began again. "And don't give me your regular 'I'm fine' please."

I sat in silence looking at my cup of tea for a little bit deciding on the best way to answer her. I looked back up at her to see her looking at me, worry for me etched into her eyes and face.

It meant a lot to me to realize how deeply she really cared for me, maybe it was because I saw that she did care for me that caused me to tell her how I really felt, and maybe it was because I knew that she would know if I didn't tell her how I really felt, maybe it was both of those reasons, maybe it was neither, despite what caused it I found myself telling her how I really felt, about everything. **(Cheesy isn't it pretty much everything in this chapter. So I'm not sure if cheesy is the write word but you no what I mean, none of this stuff is very likely.)**"I don't know, I'm dealing, but it's hard. Gabriel was my brother, how am I supposed to feel? And if that's not bad enough fathers still in a depression caused by his death, being around to see him like this it just, it's hard. I wish Mum were here. She would no what to do to make father happy again wouldn't she?" I looked up at Esme, tears were now cascading down my face making her face blurry, and so I couldn't see what she looked like. Esme came over and helped me get up, she brought me over to a couch so that we could be comfortable but she could hold me while I cried. I continued to tell Esme on how nice it was when I met Alice because she was there for me from the start. As I told Esme this I couldn't help but feel a loss, Esme felt like my mother. She had taken up that post when my mother Renee had died, but I was sad that I never would be able to do this with her. When I was done telling Esme my thoughts we sat in silence again, and I could tell from Esme's face that she was lost in thought yet again. I in turn thought about what I had told her. I'm not sure how long we sat there but Esme finally broke the silence.

"Bella?"

"Yes."

"I was thinking, well this idea has been in the back of my head for awhile now, but Bella, how would you like to come live with Carlisle, Edward, and me? I don't think that this is a good environment you're in; it's filled with constant depression and how are you supposed to be happy then. Also you should continue your schoolwork and how will you do that if you are always trying to take care of Charlie, and keep the house clean, all the things a mistress of a house does?"

I was hesitant to give her an answer. I knew she was right, but I had never liked Edward he was always mean to me, if it weren't for him I wouldn't mind living with Carlisle and Esme so much, but this was also my home it had been for my entire life how could I just leave to live with Carlisle, and Esme? I guess Esme saw that I wasn't sure, but then again who would be, because she continued with, "it wouldn't be a permanent stay unless you would want to make it that and it was alright with Charlie, just until Charlie is well enough to take care of you. I don't know how long that could be, but I would feel much better if you agreed."

I thought about it and decided against from what I'm sure was my better judgment to accept the offer if it was all right with father.

As time went on and preparations were made for me to stay at the Cullen's, I grew nervous, but I couldn't back out now. I wouldn't back out now, I new Esme was really happy about my decision to live with her family, so I would go on with the plan, I would and could not back out know.

I'm sorry but I didn't edit this chapter so I'm guessing that it isn't that good, at all at all. Just so you know.

Sorry that it was rushed, another thing if you have any ideas where Bella should live in England please let me know, because I have no idea whatsoever where it should be. Thank you review please and tell me your opinion on the poll, at the moment dead even so I need more votes. If you were confused on anything else just tell me please. Sorry for how short this chapter is, I'm working on the next chapter, which hopefully will be longer, but I'm having a hard time on writing what I want to say, Edward is supposed to be mean to her, and I just am having a hard time writing that so if you have any ideas please tell me. Thank you for reading. Please review and tell me what you think of this chapter, be honest, it really helps to have feedback. Thank you for the reviews last chapter, and please, please, please review.

One more thing and I promise I'm done, I'll be going on a trip soon and I won't be back till the middle of June so I probably won't update till then. Thanx for putting up with me.


	5. Chapter 4

**Hey everyone I'm back and with my longest chapter yet. Please review because I refuse to post until I get at least 10 reviews. Come on I know you can do it, at the moment I have 1147 hits, 22 reviews, 8 favorites, and 19 alerts. So make my day and put a smile on my face by reviewing. And I haven't been good at updating _but _I have the next chapter written. And even though I'm insanely busy I'll make an extra hard effort to update more often. Love you all and don't forget to review at the end I'll even put up a reminder for you. **

**Constructive criticism is welcome but please don't do it to be mean. There was something else I was going to say but I forgot it. **

**Enjoy the chapter.  
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**Chapter 4**

I nervously paced the living room anxious on how my new life would go; moving in with the Cullen's might change every aspect of it.

The Cullen's that meant Edward. Edward and I had never gotten along he was always teasing and embarrassing me; and I hated him for it. It's not like he had a reason to do it, or at least not one that I knew of, I had never done anything to him. All I can do at this point is hope for the best: that we both ignore each other and not have any run-ins.

The crunch of wheels turning on the cobblestone drive pulled me from my thoughts, already knowing whom it was I gathered my belongings and headed toward the door. My father joined me after a knock was heard, we had already said our good-by's to each other a while ago I let Carlisle in the house and turned to bring my things to the front door leaving father and Carlisle to talk.

Lugging my bags to the door I overheard Charlie's voice saying "Thank you again Carlisle for doing this. It was hard to see her and know that my son was dead while she was alive. I mean I'm glad that she is alive, but it still hurts." Carlisle waved his hand to silence him and said, "Charlie, Esme and I are ecstatic, we want to help. We have both always wanted a daughter especially Esme who lost her baby. Bella is the daughter that we never had." Carlisle's voice was lost as I sat there, tears threatened to spill over, I may have become an emotional wreck after Gabriel's death but that didn't mean I didn't enjoy the feeling of being wanted.

A numb feeling crawled slowly getting slightly faster as it went up my arm bringing me back into the present, I had been standing stock still until then and with out even realizing why I was tumbling to the ground. A loud thud was heard and I let out a groan. My father called out to me asking if I was all right, I told him I was fine, I had just lost my balance. Seeing that this was a regular occurrence, he didn't respond back. I got up quickly – well quickly for me – and finished bringing my bags all the way in the front room.

They had gone silent while I was in my trance from before and were silent again when I had brought all my things in they looked at me and asked, "Is this all there is?" with a nod of my head he continued. "Well I'll bring it out and let you two say your good-by's." Without waiting for a response he took the bags and went out the door.

My father and I just looked at each other, an awkward silence hung thick in the air, making me wonder slightly if it had been tainted. Breaking the suffocating silence my father said "Well…this is good-by for now…I guess." I could tell he felt awkward, but so did I, how was I supposed to help him out. Instead of even trying I made a small movement with my head that agreed with his statement.

As much as I loved my father, we never had a strong father daughter relationship. Making many conversations awkward. Again my father spoke while putting out his hand for me to shake. "Good-by." Putting my small hand in his warm gruff one I muttered a small good-by and before I knew it He was hugging me. "Good-by," he whispered again. "I love you, you know that, right?"

The tears were spilling over now as I hugged my father back answering with "umhmm." Through my tears and sobs I thought I heard him say, "Father…your mother…proud." Not really hearing what he said I just held him tight and whispered in a hoarse voice that I loved him as well. He pulled back to look at me and wiped away my tears with his thumbs while his hands rested on my face. I could see some glistening lines on his face – tearstains. I smiled slightly in response to this-it was rare either of us showed much of our emotions but when they were shown it was wonderful to know for sure that the emotions were being strongly felt-he simply smiled in response and said, "don't be any trouble for the Cullen's Bella," Bella, he had called me Bella! My heart began to beat fast, my father had never called me Bella always saying that Isabella was my given name and I should be grateful for it. So hearing him say it made me quite happy. My father finished what he was saying, "it was good of them to take you in and you should be grateful for it."

I nodded my head again while saying a quick but soft, "I won't."

Carlisle knocked on the door to let us know he was coming in and sure enough he came right through the door. He asked me if I was ready to go yet, stepping away from my father I told Carlisle I was ready. He held the door waiting for me before leaving. Everything seemed to be in slow motion as I walked to the door, I was only a step or so away when I turned around and flung myself at my father again, hugging him to me as hard as I could. Whispering to him one last time before I left, and didn't seem him for who knew how long, that I loved him, and I would miss him. Startled he had stood stock still before moving to hug me back. I don't know how long we sat there hugging before I knew that it was time for me to leave the comfort of his arms. Pulling away I walked backwards to the door before turning around and running to Carlisle's buggy. **(That's what they are called right? Or is it carriage? Well you get the idea.)**

The tears came as I waited for Carlisle; the tears for Gabriel's death, the tears for my mother, for never getting close to Charlie and now leaving, tears and worries for what turn my life would take now that it was changing, for the better or worse I didn't know.

While I had been crying I hadn't noticed any of my surroundings even as Carlisle got in and looked at me, even as we pulled away from the home I had grown up in. When my sobs had stopped and the tears began to flee away from the sun that dried them up, **(He I was trying to make that sound cool, but it didn't come out very well did it. When I said that I was meaning that she had stopped crying, the sun seemed really bright and were drying up the tears on her face, incase it confused anyone.) **I became aware of my surroundings again. By now we had left the city and were riding through the country to the Cullen's country house – that they usually lived in year round unless they needed to be close to town –.

After 20 minutes of being jostled in the buggy I saw their house, and began to get nervous all over again; asking myself why I had agreed to this. Carlisle must've seen this and reassuringly placed a hand on my shoulder squeezed it and said, "Everything will be fine. Don't worry." Quite noticeably this calmed me down.

When we had arrived, I noticed the door crash open and Esme stepped out running over to greet me, in response I quickly jumped out of the buggy and ran to her, embracing her tightly. **(Maybe it's just me but I personally can't **_**quite**_** see Esme and Bella doing that, maybe I could see Bella doing it, you know what, I don't know, I just don't know.)** Ok, ok so that's what I meant to do what _really _happened was that I jumped out landing awkwardly on my foot and my dress catching on the buggy for a moment before it decided to rip instead.

Carlisle had come over to help me up and examine me, with Esme right behind him. Despite the throbbing pain in my ankle I said I was fine. By this time I was really embarrassed. I hadn't even been here for 10 seconds before already ripping a dress and injuring my self. Oh yeah I was off to a great start; if I continue like this everyone will be in a hospital, the house would have burned down and I would be permanently injured and dying of embarrassment. All I wanted to do now was go bury myself alive and never see another person again. So you can see why I insisted I was fine; I just wanted to be left alone, in my embarrassment.

Carlisle gave me a long hard look before nodding ok, that he believed I was okay. So getting up trying to be careful of my ankle I started limping my way to the house quite proud of myself until I realized the back of my dress had ripped wide open. The heat in my face that had finally started to fade returned now with twice the force. I quickly went to grab my dress and hold it together to only realize there wasn't anything _there. _The blush in my face must've made a new shade of red. **(I know I know that phrase is used a lot but I couldn't think of anything better to say at the moment.)** I turned around to see amusement in both Esme, and Carlisle's faces. Esme was trying to hold her laughter back by covering her mouth with her hand, while Carlisle was biting his bottom lip, Glaring, at them I began to walk backwards to save myself some dignity, only to hear laughter emitting from right outside the house quickly I turned around to see Edward with none other then my very own cousin Emmett McCarty. Utterly embarrassed, I let myself fall to the ground begging to let myself to just die now before any more embarrassment or at least unconsciousness to come my way.

When neither came I tried to ebb the unconsciousness to come closer by banging my head, not bothering to stop even when a headache came, I was laying down in the dirt by now causing Edward and Emmett to laugh even harder.

Finally everything around me began to blur and voices became more distant. I vaguely heard Esme reprimanding the boys for laughing at my traumatizing moment, and my last thought before I was lost to a world of absolute bliss at the time was a promise to myself it was that, 'I would never be seen by anyone ever again.' **(Ok it's me again just wanted to tell you guys that I don't know if you can really knock yourselves out like that in fact I don't think you can, actually I just don't know I've never tried to and I don't plan to ever try and do that. And also do you think I should stop there? You know I don't think I will you guys deserve more for putting up with me and reading this story.) **

I woke up dizzy, not recognizing where I was before everything popped back into place in my mind, I blushed scarlet when I remembered everything that had happened. Especially when I realized that Edward _and_ Emmett both saw it happen. Neither would let me ever live it down.

That was when I first realized what the room around me looked like. The floor was made out of a Honey Oak, and the bed I was lying in was a four-poster canopy bed. The canopy was a cream color outlined with a gold color, and a gold rope holding it back, so I could see out.

In wonder I slid out of the warm bed. There was a writing desk by the wall and on closer inspection I realized the wood was a Cinnamon Cherry Distress and it had flowers carved into it. On the desk there was a hurricane vase filled with pink roses, snapdragons, Oriental lilies, green hydrangea, purple tulips and hydrangea. I could tell immediately they were from Esme's flower garden. **(Picture of bouquet should be up soon unless I can't figure out how to put it up.)**

I saw a dresser with the same design as the desk, a fireplace, and a big window that I could sit at and look out over the countryside. Then 3 doors, the first one of course led to the rest of the house, another led to a washroom, my very own washroom, then the last led to a closet! I couldn't believe I had a closet and a dresser? When I had finished looking around washed up and changed before going and sitting by the window. As late as it was I wasn't tired. So instead I stayed up long after Esme had come in and said goodnight reading _Romeo and Juliet_ by Shakespeare.

Maybe around one in the morning I got up to finally go to bed again. When I was walking back to the bed I felt another pain in my foot and realized that I had probably jammed my ankle when I had jumped out of the buggy earlier. I blushed just thinking about it, but then wondered why I had forgotten about it. The only reason that made even a tiny bit of sense was that I was hardly on it and when I was, I was in awe by everything around me.

That night I slept the best that I had slept in almost a year.

**Ok so review and check my poll I really need to know. I want to write the chapters quickly but I need to know first. I'm also going to find some more pictures that fit my descriptions and i apologize for not being way descriptive and be honest in your reviews if your confused on anything tell me and i'll do my best to answer your questions. love you Becca  
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	6. Chapter 5

**You can skip this next part just says why I haven't been able to update.**

Hey everyone sorry for not updating, I can explain though. I was gone for a couple of weeks, then came home and had to get ready for a reception my brother had, then get ready lots and lots of company (my family puts on a huge firework show on July 3rd. You really probably didn't need to know that but then oh well) Right after that I went to live with my sister for a couple more weeks when she got engaged and is getting married it September. So were really busy but we took off like another week for fun before buckling back in for the ride.

I got that thing of skipping from an author that I don't remember who was but it wasn't my idea.

**You can read now**

I know that all I gave you is excuses but they're the truth. I don't expect you to forgive me I just wanted you to know that I'm still here and am really sorry and I think I'm rambling again.

Hey one more important thing before we begin. I know that the chapter before last I think? I don't think I was very clear about Edward and Bella's age, so here's their ages

**For that same chapter**

**Bella is: 14**

**Alice is: 14**

**Edward is: 15**

Thanks for sticking with me you all are the best.

Constructive criticism is welcomed gladly

This chapter is not really edited like all my chapters.

**Chapter 5**

**3****rd**** POV **(a sneak peak into what's happening elsewhere)

An old bearded man sat at the table in the corner of a tavern waiting, just waiting. If you didn't know to look for him, you would easily miss him from the shadows that fell over the dark corner he sat in.

The door banged open allowing the cool May air in, closely followed by a young man with brown curly hair. His beady brown eyes darted around the tavern until he spotted what he was looking for. Eyes staying still and not wavering he walked towards it not acknowledging anything around him.

The old bearded man sat keeping eye contact while the curly brown haired man walked forward. As the man walking got closer the older bearded man broke eye contact and began looking the other man over. A thin pale scar ran along the younger man's left cheek. It was he all right. Before quitting the scan the older man noticed a limp on the right leg of the curly brown haired man. The last time they had seen each other it hadn't been there. What could have the younger man possibly done to get himself hurt? If he had followed orders then he'd have been fine.

As he made his way to the table he kept eye contact with the gray blue eyes of the bearded man sitting at the table. When he got fairly close the older man broke the eye contact to study him. His gray-blue eyes flashed to his cheek then down to his right leg. Annoyed the younger man thought, 'Typical, you could expect nothing else from him. He's a superstitious old man, and how I got stuck with him I don't know. Were constantly bickering and don't work well together. Yet the boss still put us together. If I was just working by myself everything would be going smoothly but of course no one would believe that.'

When the younger man got to the table he plopped into the open seat not waiting for an invitation. He looked to the gray eyes staring back at him. A few minutes passed in silence until the older man stopped their little staring contest by asking in a gruff voice "What happened?"

The young man snapped back in a low voice, "What? My leg?"

"That's not," but before he could finish the younger man snapping back interrupted him by saying, "Oh yeah. Don't get me wrong. I just saw you staring at it earlier, but no forgive me for knowing you would ask?"

"As curious…"

He was interrupted again by the young man snidely saying, "superstitious you mean."

The older man was getting tired of being interrupted so he took a deep breath to calm himself. The last thing they needed right now was attention. "Don't interrupt me; we can fight later but not now we can't afford the attention."

"Like it'll bring attention to us here." The curly brown haired man was leaning back in the chair causing the two front legs of the chair to come up in the air with his arms spread out to both of his sides.

The older man was loosing his cool now and slammed his fist on the table, before speaking, "Considering we're in the darkest corner it very well could, along with what we say to each other. If we're caught now, we're as good as dead."

Understanding flashed across his brown eyes and he instantly quieted. As much as he hated to admit it, what the old man had said was true, they would be dead if anyone found out now.

The older man continued with his questions from the beginning, "What happened when you talked to the boss?"

A grimace crossed the younger man's face before he answered, "Not good he wasn't happy I didn't have any "useful" information to give." After a pause he lamely finished with "That's where the limp came from." There was no need to explain any more.

There was a long pause before the older man spoke, "I see. What do you think we should do?"

In aggravation a response was given, "If I knew we'd be doing it and would have the information we needed."

"No reason to get snappy I was just asking."

"Oh yeah, I have no reason to not get snappy I just got tortured for not having the information I needed, a threat at losing my life, and a leg that doesn't work properly anymore. No I have not reason to be snappy life's just dandy."

"Alright, alright, calm down, I was just asking; but we really do need to find away to get information out of him."

"Oh really, I hadn't realized that."

"Would you quit with the sarcasm now."

"Fine then, what do you think we should do?"

"Continue to do what we were. He's bound to talk in the end."

**Hey again so did you like it? Please tell me in a review. **

**I'm honestly hoping this chapter confused you and you have no idea what's going on but if you figure it out…oh well.**

**Vote on my pole **

**P.S. this chapter took place the same time as the last chapter.  
**

**Thanx for reading and sorry for the length.**


	7. Chapter 6

Hey everyone it's me again aren't you proud of me I got another chapter up, it's unedited except going over it once. What I was to excited to get it up.

I just want to thank all of you for being amazing and reading my story.

Review please it keeps me going.

**OH and should I try and update tomorrow?**

Or work on it while I wait to get my breaking dawn copy next week. sobb I don't want to wait that long Its up to you.

Enjoy.

**Chapter 6**

**One month later **(it is now the beginning June 1714, edward is not quite 16)

I had barely been here one month and was quite proud of myself. So far I had managed to avoid seeing Edward. I mean I saw him at meal times but if I was talking, it was to Esme mostly and sometimes Carlisle. So there was nothing he could do to make fun of me except…well nothing, without getting into a severe amount of trouble.

I was thinking about this while I walked through Esme's gardens. It was calming to just look out at the beauty surrounding you. Each plant (especially the flowers) was beautiful, in there own unique way.

Taking a deep breath I continued to walk down the path. I could feel a deep sense of freedom in the air and without thinking I took off running, when I stopped I just turned in circles looking up at the sky. I felt as if I had grasped at freedom and for once in my life had it in my control, until my foot caught on something as I was spinning. Trying as desperately as I possibly could to stay upright, it was to no avail I fell plunging into freezing cold water. It wasn't until then I realized I had walked all the way to the pond In the middle of the gardens. Coming up for a gasping breath I splashed my way back to the path looking for what had caused me to trip.

I may be clumsy and trip over air quite a lot but that wasn't from air I remember my foot distinctly catching on something. Thinking all of this through I looked to where I had tripped and saw a rope? Following the rope with my eyes I saw it pass over the walkway limply and that's when I heard and saw Edward, he was laying on the ground clutching his sides from laughing so hard. What a pinhead, I was going to rip him to pieces. First he deliberately plans on tripping me so that I fall in the pond and now he laughs at me. He was going to regret doing that.

Making my way over to him angrily not even thinking about what I would say to him. When I was next to him he noticed me, he tried to quiet down, he looked at me and smiled innocently. I didn't budge my eyes narrowed as he asked in an innocent voice. "Yes? May I help you?" As he said this I could see the corner of his mouth twitching upward in a smile and knew that he was trying to cover his smile.

In all my anger I pointed my finger at him and struggled to find something to say. "You, …you …you pinhead."

Instantly I regretted saying it amusement caught his face and he, "Pinhead?" he asked curiously before going on, "Can't you come up with anything more creative?"

Glaring at him furiously I just ignored his comment and said, "You really shouldn't do that to people."

"Do what?"

"You know very well what."

"Oh," after a pause of him pretending to think hard, he continued, "but I don't."

I couldn't believe him, he knew what we were talking about, he just wanted me to say it out loud so he could deny it and embarrass me even further. Well I just wouldn't give in. After hearing Edwards laugh that he tried to cover up as a cough made me realize the position I was in. Standing there like an idiot, my mouth hanging open waiting for flies to fly in and then my eyes were as big as saucers. Instantly I blushed and realizing he could see that he had embarrassed me I just blushed harder. In an instant my anger came blazing back; and without thinking it through I just whispered as menacingly as I could before turning to go, "You will regret doing that and I will get you back."

As I walked away I heard him say in mockingly scared voice, "Oh I'm so scared, someone help me."

I stopped in my tracks and turned to see him smiling content with what he did, I simply said, "This may be easier than I thought if your already scared." Before turning around I smirked at him and saw him glare at me.

Quite proud of myself I walked back to the house and began to sneak up to my room. When I was on the stairs I ran into Esme who looked at me with a shocked expression before asking, "Bella dear what happened? Your soaked."

I gave her a one worded reply, "Edward" before continuing up to my room. She knew that Edward and I didn't get along. I think that because we hadn't had a problem for a month that she thought we might be able to get along now. If she only knew, Edward had started a war. He may have won this battle but I would win the war.

When I got to my room I went and took a warm bath warming up my freezing body.

* * *

After I was warm and dressed again I came out of my washroom drying my hair a piece of white paper caught my eye. Going over to it I bent down and picked it up. Unfolding it I saw elegant writing and recognized it as Edwards immediately.

As much as I hated to admit it the guy had good penmanship, better then mine but you would never here me say that out loud.

Unfolding it the rest of the way I read what is said.

_Tattletale_

_You can't even stick up for yourself_

_All you can do is run to Esme for help _

_Do you know another word for tattletale?_

_Here I'll tell you it might be too much for you to figure out_

_TattletaleCoward_

I'd be lying if I said the not didn't hurt. I wasn't a tattletale, Esme asked why I was wet and I just said his name. She must have gone to talk to him. Another thing I didn't like was that he had said that I couldn't even stick up for myself. Well I'll show him and make him eat his words. Also if any one was a coward here it was him not me.

Narrowing my eyes in the anger that had come back fully fueled. I went to my desk picked up a piece of paper and wrote my own note to him. Saying…

_You call me a coward_

_Your not even man enough to say you're the one who did it _

_Besides Esme's the one who asked what happened _

_I simply told her the truth_

_Oh and quite you're whining it makes you sound like a 2 year old_

Smiling to myself I folded it up and walked out of my room to Edwards door. When I got there I neatly bent down and slid the it underneath his door as he had done to me, before going to my room so I could think of ways to get back at Edward. After all I'd promised him I would and I wouldn't want to break a promise now would I.

Hey did you like it? I must know I'm so happy I have

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**review**

**review**

**and vote on my poll I need to know that so I can write that part down soon.**

love you all i had something else I wanted to say but I don't remember well see ya

Becca


	8. Chapter 7

Hey everyone, I'm going to be gone for a few days and I'll try to get a chapter up on Saturday but I can't promise anything because I'll be coming home from camping and having a few hour brake at my house before I leave for another week, and after that my sister who doesn't like the twilight books will be coming down for a few days, at least I think its then.

**Bottom line I'm very busy and this could possibly be the last chapter for the rest of the month, hopefully not though.**

Enjoy

Chapter 7

While in my room I sat just sat. When I had come back to my room my intentions had been to get back at Edward. Instead when I had sat down next to the window **(A/N ok I have no idea what there called, and I'm to lazy to look it up, but Bella's sitting on one of those one things that are in a lot of old movies, and are like a bench under the window so you can sit down and look out.) **I saw the sunset beginning to form. I hadn't realized how late it was but even now the time didn't fully register. My mind was void of all thoughts.

A knock on the door pulled off the black blanket covering my thoughts. When a second knock wrung in the air I called out, not caring who it was a simply, "Come in."

Even though I heard the door open and close I continued to just stare out the window. In some depth of my mind I knew it was rude, but when I couldn't even concentrate on the thoughts in the front of my mind.

When a small cough was heard I grudgingly turned from my perch, to see who had entered. It was Esme. She walked over and asked if she could sit down. Not really caring I just shrugged my shoulders before turning back to the window.

As we sat in silence a dull ache prodded my chest. Thinking back I realized that's why I hadn't been planning to get back at Edward. I just hadn't noticed it. A tear slipped out of the corner of my right eye. I now swiftly recognized what it was from, realizing it should have been obvious from the moment it began. But hadn't and I wasn't sure if I was grateful about that or sad. Another tear slipped out and before I registered anything else I was silently crying. Esme must've noticed this because a few moments later I was crying into her shoulder hanging on as if my life depended on it.

I don't know how long we sat their Esme simply giving me the comfort that had avoided me for a year's time at least. At this thought my eyes burned and let out the salty tears that continued to come.

Esme hadn't said anything, which I was grateful for. I suppose she knew that I just needed a good cry, and would tell her when I was ready. Even when my tears had quite falling Esme continued to rock me back and forth in her arms. Using this time to sort out my thoughts I found myself being buried in many of my memories. Some of them mad me laugh while others made me cry for. When I had come back to the present my mind pulled me back in time.

I quickly realized this was not a memory I could easily remember. It must've been from when I was at the most a year.

Flashback

A man that resembled Charlie stood next to me, while a beautiful lady that could only be described as an angel held me. She had blonde wavy hair that was falling out of a bun. Her eyes were a deep blue that looked as if they could pierce your soul.

The man looked to her and said, "Katherine we should leave now, Renee and Charlie are here. They'll take good care of Bella. Trust me."

The lady only held me tighter before saying in a flowing soprano voice, "I know Jonathon, but do we really have to leave? Is it really that important that you…know go?"

The man came over and hugged the angel with me sandwiched between the two, but it was not uncomfortable like I expected it to be, more like being closed to the ones you love, a comfort hanging in the air.

The man looked down at me and smiled, I giggled back and smiled back before he looked back up to Katherine and said, "Katherine I know that you aren't fond of anyone there, and neither am I, but yes we really do have to go."

Katherine looked down at me and smiled, a smile that would light up a room, before sighing and saying, "I suppose your right." After a moments pause she continued, "Alright I just didn't want to leave Bella. Lets go I want to get this over with as quickly as possible so I can come home and see this beautiful little girl again."

With that they walked out of the room with the man Jonathan's arm wrapped around Katherine's shoulders while she held me. When they came to a stop. I looked around and saw Renee, and a much younger looking Charlie. Katherine walked over to my mom Renee and handed me over to her. While saying "Take good care of her Renee. Please." Then she looked down at me and said, "I love you Bella, be good okay?" While this exchange took place the strange man named Jonathan shook hands with Charlie before the couple switched places and Katherine was hugging Charlie and Jonathan hugged Renee, before leaning down to me and said, "I love you Bella, you always remember that okay?" Then stepping away he took Katherine's hand and said, "See you later, and thank you so much for doing this, Renee, Charlie."

After that they turned and walked out into the chilly night air.

_End of Flashback_

As I sat after that last memory of so long ago that I had not even remembered until now I wondered if that had even been my memory. I had no recollection of who those people were. Yet they seemed so familiar. I felt as if I knew them. That I had a bond, but for the life of me could not recollect who they were, all the memory had done was confuse me. What I realized I wanted someone to tell me who those people were.

Esme must've noticed a change in my behavior, because she pulled back and looked at me. It was then that my mouth caught up with my brain so I could speak again, but now that I had the chance to do so, I didn't know what I wanted to say, and all I could muster was a simple, "What?"

Esme looked at me before speaking, "I don't know what. That's what I was wondering myself actually."

Without thinking I started talking, " I had a flashback of when I was real little, like maybe around the age of one. There were these people, a man and a woman. The man called the women Katherine. She was very beautiful and had long wavy blonde hair, with piercing blue eyes. She called the man Jonathan. He was handsome with brown hair and brown eyes. They both seemed very familiar, but I also feel like I've never seen them before. They were extremely kind and I dearly wish I could've gotten to know her." When I had finished my explanation I finally realized that Esme had gone rigid, what I said next brought her back to reality, "Esme are you okay?"

"Oh yes darling, yes I'm fine. Just a little shocked on how you went from depressed to intrigued." I could tell that she wasn't telling the truth but I didn't press the issue since I knew she wouldn't avoid telling me the whole truth unless it was for the best. After a few minutes pause, she looked at me and said, "Bella you don't have to answer but I'd like it if you did, before what were you crying about?"

"Oh nothing. It was dumb, just about how much I missed my Mom and Gabriel, why there are so many deaths in my family. That's about all it was."

After I'd finished saying that Esme took me firmly by the shoulders and said, "Bella there never is a stupid reason for crying over a loved one that you miss. Do you understand? Crying over them doesn't make you weak no matter what some people may say." I could see where she was coming from so I nodded my head to her saying I understood, before leaning over and giving her a hug.

When I let go she stood up and said, "Dinner should be ready now. Should we go down?" In response I got up and pulled Esme to the door signaling I was hungry and ready for dinner.

A/N I know it doesn't seem like there is much point to the chapter and like it's depressing but you'll understand why I put it there soon enough. Don't ask me when soon is.

This chapter really isn't edited. I was trying to get it typed up so I could post it, well it's 2:33 in the morning here and I still need to pack so see you.

**I stayed up lat for you guys so the least you could do is review. Thanx.**


	9. Chapter 8

**Okay I'm not even going to give you an excuse but I apologize for not updating beforhand.**

**If you happen to be interested in whats going on in my life I'll leave a not at the bottom.**

A/N what the heck was I thinking when I put that authors note up, well as you can see I deleted it and replaced it with a chapter. My sisters getting married guys on Friday that is sooo weird oh my goodness.

Anyways I hope you enjoy the chapter because it was a pain in the but to write I've written it more than once and each time it comes out really badly so I'm hopping this one works out.

Enjoy and review

**Poll results are on the bottom**

Recap

_When I let go she stood up and said, "Dinner should be ready now. Should we go down?" In response I got up and pulled Esme to the door signaling I was hungry and ready for dinner._

Chapter 8

I looked wearily at the bright orange fire jumping wildly in the air looking as if it were free while in reality it was trapped or confined carefully to the fireplace. All in all that's how I felt I was free to do most everything I wanted but if you were to walk into my head you'd be pulled into a battle immediately.

Over the last two days I had thought about my recent flashback and I guess somewhere deep inside of me had always known that Charlie and Renee were not my parents and that Katherine and Jonathan were, even though I hadn't even known about them before. Some of my thoughts constantly repeated themselves saying things like 'nothing is what it seems' and **(ok really quickly I don't know if they had the next saying then but just pretend they did)** 'don't judge a book by its cover' I don't know why that one kept repeating itself but it did.

These battles over what was the truth had kept me awake these past few nights and tonight was no exception, hence why I was still up, tired, not in my room, and staring at the fire.

So far my mind well part of my mind had come to the conclusion that: 1) I had made up the entire flashback and it wasn't a flashback at all, or 2) that Katherine and Jonathon were my parents and something had happened to them making Charlie and Renee act as my parents, the question to this one was, what had happened to them? I had to say that as much as I was routing for #1 (it would make things so much easier that way) but I didn't think that it was very probable so unwillingly I was believing option 2.

I wanted to know for sure though, wouldn't anyone else after they had a seed of doubt that grew each passing moment that their parents weren't their real parents. It was enough to shock anyone.

Ever so slowly the fire began to burn down as I began to drift to sleep. Before I knew it everything was black.

I awoke suddenly to a large thump that sounded like someone falling to the ground. By now my heart was beating a million miles an hour, I was so frightened and instantly wished I was just back up in my room. Slowly I went to get up but before barely moving I slumped back down I wasn't sure that I really wanted to go through the long hallways to get to my room but upon hearing the sound of whooshing I was up in an instant when a sharp pain hit my head and I was back on the chair clutching at my head. Upon realizing what had happened including what had woken me up. It was fairly obvious that Edward had taken advantage of my being asleep, no not just asleep but deeply asleep and tied my hair to the chair!! Who does that, and how the heck does he think I'm to untie my hair, because he did a pretty darn good job of it. I should know because even with all my yanking and pulling from being startled and all it didn't come undone.

Just then a terrible thought entered my mind When he tied my hair he must've used one of those knots that the more you pull on it the tighter it gets. Well this is just great I'm stuck to a chair.

My fury at Edward increased ten fold as I struggled to undo the knot, and my tears were streaming down my cheeks my head hurt so bad and I felt that if I ever wanted to be free I would have to cut my hair. Just the thought made me want to scream bloody murder at Edward. This time he had gone to far and our war had barely even begun. At the same time though I really wished that he would just leave me alone, I wasn't that good at coming up with pranks. Oh who am I kidding I'm terrible and the one devious person that would help me was traveling with her family. Alice.

Eventually I gave into my self-pity and cried myself to sleep again.

For the rest of the night I had drifted between consciousness and unconsciousness; so by morning I was dead tired, my neck and back hurt from sleeping upright and to my absolute joy my hair was even more tangled and knotted from trying to just undo it in the night and thrashing around in my sleep. And to top it off I had a pounding headache. Now I have never had a hang over but from what I was told about it, that's how I felt, and lets just say there would never be a worry that I will ever get drunk in my lifetime.

All of this was Edwards fault despite the fact that I didn't go up to my room last night when I was supposed to and I should have known better. But honestly it was still all Edwards fault right? Right.

Even after waking to the first rays of the sun it still took me forever to undo the knot in my hair and it ticked me off that a chunk of my hair was ripped and I had to undo that from the chair.

When I was finally through getting the rest of my hair undone I slowly got up my body ached everywhere and limped to my room. Upon arriving in my room I discarded of my wrinkled clothing and went to warm water for a bath. I really needed one after my excursion in the living room last night.

I stayed in the bath scrubbing my skin till it ran bright red before moving on to massaging my scalp, when I felt better I climbed out and found a simple brown dress with a red empire waist.

Just thinking about last night made my face go red with fury; I honestly don't remember ever being this angry in my life. For the time being there were only two things I was sure of at the moment and they were that Edward had gone to far this time and even though I had said it last time I truly meant it this time, Edward would pay dearly. Slowly a plan began to form in my mind, sure it wasn't anything brilliant yet if I played my cards just right I could pass it off so Carlisle and Esme didn't suspect anything yet Edward would know what it was for. He may of won the battle but I would win the war.

hey keep in mind that my chapters are only half way edited. I don't know why for future stories I may want a beta but for this story i just have this urge to do it all by myself I don't know **REVIEW** it keeps me going honest to be.

**Poll results are:**

**1. Mike 7 votes**

**2. Jacob 5 votes**

**3. Eric & your choice both 2 votes**

**4. Tyler 1 vote**

**Thank you all that voted.**

**I will take this into account but I will also do what I think is best for the story and if you have any ideas feel free to share with me.**

**Now for everyone that is interested in my life lately.**

**My sister got married last month leaving me to be the only single one in my family and let me tell you it was weird, but she had a beautiful dress and it was lovely wedding, but their open house was held in a car dealership and that was just plane cool. Oh yes I also caught her bouquet. Then my other sister well I think she was due with her second child yesterday so if I don't update soon I'm sorry but she's about to give birth and my mom might be gone while my other sister (yes one I haven't mentioned yet) Comes up to work on something with my dad and I'll have to help watch her kids and then theirs the possibility that my sister in law is going to come up around the same time and visit with her two kids and her husband my brother was just sent at the beginning of this month to Iraq. Isn't that sad he has two little kids and the possibility of dying but its alright because I know he'll be alright and I also know he's in a better position then lots of other people because he's an officer the lowest ranking officer sure but still and also it helps to know that he's wanted to serve in the army since he was a little kid. Anyways I've just started school a couple months ago and dance, yes I dance so thats busy. Well I really don't think anybody read that but it's okay.**

**Review **please it helps to see your thoughts on my story good or bad.


	10. Chapter 9

A/N so sorry for the delay, please forgive me. Now there are a few things I would like to say before you continue reading.

I was rereading my story and I realized I was making Bella very emotional or teary-eyed. I'm really sorry about that and I'll try to quite doing so. But she did lose her brother. This is also the reason her and Alice were able to become friends so fast, she needed someone to lean on.

I've gone over the timeline and have figured it out in my mind once again, it should be permanent now, and I'll leave it on the bottom.

Bella and Alice are both 14 they'll be turning 15 soon enough, and Edward is 15. You see I've been going back and forth for a while between the ages but I believe that's the final one.

Now on with the story

Oh and do you want me to put recaps up from now on?

Recap

_Just thinking about last night made my face go red with fury; I honestly don't remember ever being this angry in my life. For the time being there were only two things I was sure of at the moment and they were that Edward had gone to far this time and even though I had said it last time I truly meant it this time, Edward would pay dearly. Slowly a plan began to form in my mind, sure it wasn't anything brilliant yet if I played my cards just right I could pass it off so Carlisle and Esme didn't suspect anything yet Edward would know what it was for. He may of won the battle but I would win the war._

Chapter 9

Sitting at my vanity I brushed my hair out while thinking. It had been one week since I had begun to formulate my plan and now it was almost complete.

Before getting up to leave I looked at myself one last time. What I saw surprised me. I looked…pleasant. My hair was tied up in a plain cream ribbon with some hair falling down to frame my face, my lips were red but with my pale skin it didn't look bad. The dress I was wearing definitely wasn't a favorite but it didn't look too bad right now. (pic in profile) During this scan of myself I felt my self-confidence rising and along with it came a smile. I would need as much confidence as I could get, we were having guests over for dinner tonight and I would embarrass myself, but if things went right it would hurt Edward more than me.

Quickly I picked up the edge of my dress and set off for the kitchen.

I had finally convinced Esme to let me prepare a meal for tonight and to serve it saying that I had something special in mind for dinner and desert that I would like to serve.

Looking around I saw that the dinner was prepared, and saw to it that the desert would finish boiling while we were eating.

While in the kitchen I went over my plan again and nodded to myself. Hopefully the guests would be here quickly I didn't know how long I could wait before hyperventilating. Not a minute later there was a knock on the front door and I jumped to my feet swiftly and made for the front door stumbling along the way.

When I'd reached the door the sight of Esme welcoming the guests greeted me. Looking them over I saw a couple and a young man that happened to catch my eye. He looked about the same age as Edward if not a little older. And he was handsome with his dark curly hair and brown eyes, muscular arms and a strong jaw.

In the moment that I was analyzing him, he looked over to me. Hastily I bowed my head mortified that I'd been caught. Hearing a slight chuckle I felt blood rushing to my face. Even with the predicament I was in I couldn't help but peek up at the handsome face that I now saw staring straight at me. The red in my cheeks glowed bright again and this time I turned away slightly.

To my utmost humiliation Esme noticed I'd entered and wasted no time before introducing me, "Bella I didn't see you there, anyhow Bella I would like you to meet Mr. and Mrs. Brown along with there son Andrew. Mr., Mrs., Brown, Andrew this is Bella Swan."

"How do you do?" I asked meekly yet politely shocked to see Andrew was still staring blatantly at me.

Mrs. Brown answered kindly, "Quite well. Thank you. And yourself?"

"I'm well."

Before anymore conversation was continued Andrew walked over towards me bowed, took my hand and kissed it, then said in a soothing voice, "It's a pleasure to meet you Miss. Bella."

"The pleasure's all mine." I responded without thinking.

"Well shall we head to the dining room now, after all Bella has prepared a most wonderful meal."

Startled I turned from Andrew to see Esme who looked delighted while watching Andrews and my exchange. When I looked at the others I saw Mrs. Brown looked just as delighted as Esme if not more so. Blushing I continued to look around the room and saw that Carlisle, who was talking animatedly with Mr. Brown, and Edward who looked as if he wanted to be anywhere but here, had both joined us.

Slowly everyone began to file out of the room and when I turned to walk away I heard the same soothing voice of Andrew ask, "May I walk the lady to the dining room?"

Smiling I replied, "I'm not much of a lady, but yes I suppose you can."

Taking my arm in his we headed off. "Of course you are."

I just chuckled at his persistence and answered easily, "Think what you will even if it isn't true."

The rest of the walk was met with silence until we got to the entryway where regrettably I had to take my leave. Apologizing I made my may to the kitchen to get the first dish to serve.

The dinner had gone well so far with, only having Edward try to trip me every once in awhile. My most famous time of the night though was when they all complemented my dish even Edward who did it grudgingly, but all the same I made sure he saw the smirk on my face before turning to get the desert.

Once in the kitchen I began to dish up the date and walnut pudding thinking what a loss that some would have to go to waste. Before putting on the sauce I decided to go head on out with it and pretend that I'd already taken the pudding out to the table.

When I'd gotten to the table I looked around as if looking for something, which I was just not what they were thinking I would look for. See I was trying to figure out how to continue my plan from here on out.

It only took a moment for me to decide. I walked to the side of the table Edward sat at and just so happened to be one of the closes to the kitchen. I scanned the table again and then said quietly, "Just a moment I seem to have forgotten half of the desert."

That's when I saw it and my plan went out the window well not really but half of it. While I'd planned to set the sauce down and 'accidentally' push it onto Edwards lap. Edward had made it ten times easier by sticking out his foot for me to trip on.

I decided right there and then I'd give him what he wanted but my mission would be completed as well. See it's a win, win situation here. Smiling I continued forward. It only took a second for my foot and Edwards shoe to become acquaintances and Edward and the bowl of sauce to meet. Rolling around on the ground I saw everyone staring in shock at Edward who was covered with white sauce glaring daggers at me. Before yelling "You idiot."

Feigning shock I covered my mouth with my hand and acted hurt while trying to suppress the giggles and said as innocently as possible "Shouldn't have tripped me."

Forgetting we were surrounded by witnesses in his fury he shouted, "It's not like you didn't see it."

I looked at Edward silently questioning his sanity and why he'd just shouted that he was guilty in front of everyone, before looking around the table. Looking back over to Edward I saw that it seemed as if he understood his mistake, and I noticed his face had paled considerably. When I shifted my gaze back over to the people around us I clearly saw that everyone was in shock.

As the moments passed I saw anger boiling into Esme's face and then she broke speaking in a menacing voice, "Edward you will clean this mess up, clean up and rejoin us but I don't want to hear another disrespectful word come out of your mouth again." Her voice clearly stated that she wanted no arguing.

Silently but still casting hateful glances my way he began to clear up the mess while I went to fetch the other sauce I'd made and serve the dessert now.

Five minutes later I was taking the pudding out to everyone sauce included this time. When I was leaving the kitchen with Edwards and mine dessert I quickly decided that for tripping me I would give him one more surprise. Quickly I sprinkled some salt onto his dessert before I carried it out smiling. Setting down the dish I took a seat and sat silently inspecting those around me.

After Edward got back conversation slowly picked back up and the ones around us began to eat their pudding constantly telling me how good it was. I could tell Edward was still mad and didn't want to eat it, but hearing how good it was he gave in eventually.

All it took was one bite for him to spit it back out, spluttering and grabbing for his water. In his hurry he knocked of the glass.

I tried to keep my composure on that outside, but it was difficult seeing as I was laughing outlandishly internally at how he was making himself into a fool.

"Edward" It was Carlisle who spoke and disapproval was laced in his voice, "you will apologize to Bella at once and leave this table immediately."

"But…"Edward tried to defend himself.

"Don't but me Edward. You will do as your told" The wrath in Carlisle's voice caused me to almost feel bad for him But only almost. After all he deserved it.

Edward on the other hand glared at me muttered a hateful apology and left the room. The rest of the meal I spent in silence not looking anywhere but at my plate. On the outside I don't know what I looked like but on the inside I was leaping for joy.

When Andrew talked to me I would answer with simple answers, I had the feeling he had known what I'd done to Edward and it made me uncomfortable.

Eventually I excused myself saying I was tired, Esme and Carlisle looked at me sympathetically and said goodnight.

Once in my room I burst into laughter. I honestly couldn't wait to tell Alice as soon as I saw her again.

Later that night I heard the door open and close and new that the Browns had left. Smiling contently I dozed off.

My eyes snapped open I couldn't figure out what had woken me up. A sense of de javu surrounded me and I breathed in deeply my hands slowly making their way up to their hair to make sure I was free to move. Finding I was I breathed out heavily in thanks.

"Psst"

The sound made me jump and in a moment I was sitting up looking for the cause of it.

Annoyance filled my body as I saw the silhouette of Edward standing at my door.

In that moment I remembered my attire and snatched for the blankets on my lap to cover myself.

"What are you doing in here?" I hissed.

"Why'd you do it?"

"Do what?" I asked naively.

I could practically see the frustration emitting from him when he snapped, "you know what I mean."

"Well, lets see I told you, you'd regret doing anything to me."

Silence morphed over the two of us as Edward glared at me, while I smiled innocently back.

Then without any forewarning he whispered darkly, "Just don't think you'll get away with it."

And then he was gone, like he'd never been there in the first place.

Breathing heavily I looked at where he stood moments before. After a few minutes I lay down again and fell in a light sleep.

I woke again but instead of finding a dark room and quiet, the sun was streaming in and Edwards voice shouting. I couldn't tell what it was with it muffled but in a way I was glad.

Not long after when I was dressed and heading down for breakfast, Edward stomped up the stairs past me ignoring me completely and then I heard a door slam loudly.

Curiously I walked to the dining hall to see Carlisle and Esme whispering quietly.

"Ahem"

"Oh good morning Bella. How was your night?" Esme asked kindly.

Thinking back I remembered the interruption in the night but decided to ignore it and answered, "It was nice."

After a few moments I couldn't stand it anymore, gesturing towards the door where Edward must've stomped out I asked, "What was that about?"

"Oh, um." Esme swiftly looked toward Carlisle as if asking permission silently. Before continuing, "Edwards just upset that were sending him off to a boarding school next month."

_Again sorry for the delay, I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. It didn't turn out the way I was thinking it would but yeah. Now I don't know what time the boarding schools started then but lets just say that Edward leaves very soon._

_Thank you for all the ideas you guys gave me for pranks I was really looking forward to using some but then I found my plot line for the story I'd forgotten about and realized I had to get a move on it._

_Review please and thanks for waiting patiently for this chapter._

_**Q: **__what do you think of Andrew?_

_Becca_

_PS the timeiline is in chapters mostly but you can get an idea._

_June 6, 1713-Gabriel died chapter 1_

_Febuary1714-Alice and Bella meet Esme introduced chapter 2_

_March-April- Esme's offer in chapter 3_

_May-Bella goes to live with the Cullens chapter 4  
_

_Middle of May-Chapter 5_

_Beginning of June-Chapter 6_

_Beginning of June-Chapter 7 (same day as chapter 6)_

_Beginning of June-Chapter 8 (two days later than chapters 6 and 7)_

_Mid June-Chapter 9_


	11. Chapter 10 yes it's a real chapter

A/N Thanks to littlepinkprincess for letting me talk to you about the story, and helping me decide some things.

**Important AN** at the bottom please read it

Read and enjoy

* * *

Not long after I heard the news that Edward would be leaving my conscience had come back from vacation.

Edward and I couldn't behave maturely around one another and now I was feeling bad about it! Despite feeling this way there was another part, or also known as my evil side that was incredulous at my remorse.

_I just couldn't believe that _I_ felt guilty. I mean he'd been the one to start it in the first place._

True but I didn't have to react the way I did.

_Except anyone in there right mind would. _

Even if that was true, which it's not, it was still because of us that he won't talk to his family and that he's the one that has to leave his home.

_He should have understood not to mess with us. _

That doesn't change the fact that it's our fault.

_You can't seem to come up with anything better than that can you?_

I could but I don't have to because it's a simple fact, 'that it is our fault.'

See what I have to deal with. These two parts of me are continually arguing and frankly I'm sick of it. The only thing left to say is that hopefully when Edward leaves in a couple of days my month of complete torment will end, though honestly I highly doubted it. Then as if all of this isn't bad enough Alice's visits had continued to lessen until she never came. Honestly I hadn't gone and tried to regain my friendship with her was because of the last words she'd said to me, "Bella don't follow me, I don't want to be around you right now. When I'm ready I'll come back, but wait for me to come and talk to you before coming to get me." And then she'd left, and I'd felt as if I'd lost a friend.

I wasn't dumb so I knew something was wrong but I also had known not to go looking for Alice. Even in the short time I'd known Alice I knew she could be a terrifying little thing.

It may have been selfish of me, but that didn't change the fact that I wanted answers and I wanted someone to talk to, and honestly I wanted all of this now. But don't we all want things? The only thing is, is that we don't get what we want. I wanted those things and Edward didn't want to go to boarding school, and Esme wanted Edward to talk to us again, Carlisle wanted to be a doctor, and Alice well I don't know what Alice wanted but you get the point.

Man things seemed to be such a mess now, that's all there really was to it.

Sighing loudly I got up off the bed and walked to my window. My brain began to wake from its slumber with the searing cold window pressed to it.

Closing my eyes and breathed out heavily onto the window pain so as to fog it up. Continuing to fog the glass up I brought my right hand up and began drawing random things. Stepping back I watched as it receded back to the center.

I stood there for a minute not doing anything, not even thinking, I was just there.

Raising my hand again I touched the window pain one last time before turning away.

My door burst open and I screamed.

Clutching my heart I evaluated the person in front of me who had been so rude as to enter without permission. There standing in all her glory was Alice.

"Alice?" I asked in marvel. "What are you doing here?"

When there was no reply I looked closer and in her big blue eyes was an overload of despair. I stepped back shocked before moving forward to her. Something bad had happened or was happening. Rushing over I gathered Alice in my arms as she began sobbing.

We stood there for who knows how long with me rubbing her back. When her sobs quieted I asked quietly what had happened.

A spew of words came out in a jumbled mess. Not being able to understand the muddled set of words I grasped her arms and trying to get her attention, "Alice, slow down okay, now take a deep breathe." Seeing that she was heeding my word I finished with, "Now talk slowly so that I can understand you."

With tears in her eyes Alice gave a shaky nod before saying as clearly as she could while still crying and her croaky voice, "B..bbella," hiccup, "my my mom" hiccup, "shshe's" hiccup, "ggggona" another hiccup and then she burst into another round of tears.

I was confused; there was no other way to put it. With all of Alice's hiccupping the last part of her sentence was lost, and that seemed to be the most dire part. All I knew was that it was about her mom.

Taking Alice's hands in mine I squeezed them gently before asking, "Allie, what about your mom? What's wrong? I know you were telling me but please tell me again so I can hear."

Alice closed her eyes and tried to stop her crying by breathing deeply. It took a few minutes but Alice was able to stop. When she opened her eyes she had a determined expression cross over her face. With a few more shuddering breaths she looked me straight in the eyes looking for something.

I won't deny it I felt way uncomfortable under her scrutinizing gaze. Shuffling my feet I looked down. I'm not sure if she found what she was looking for but I don't think she did by the way she sighed tiredly and said with her voice only breaking at parts. "Bella you remember when I told you to stay away from me?" I nodded my head and replied softly, "How could I forget I felt I lost a friend that day." Sadly Alice nodded her head and said, "I did too, I did too." Seeing my confused expression Alice hurriedly continued, "you see Bella that was for the best, whether it turns out for the best or not I don't know yet. You see my mother," She stopped abruptly with silent tears falling down before she continued, "she, she, well you see a couple months ago she fell ill. My father and I didn't think it was anything serious but still we tried to make her rest completely until she fully recovered, but you know her she's just as stubborn as you, as stubborn as a mule. Well my father and I found her trying to help with everything multiple times. The more we tried to keep her in bed the more she helped around the house and the sicker she got.

"That's why my visits here began to lessen and were cut short."

"Alice why didn't you tell me I would have come over to help."

"I know, I know, that's why I didn't tell you. I didn't want you coming by because first of all I didn't want you to risk getting you sick and second I didn't want you to worry. So even though those reasons may seem silly they're still the reason I told you not to come by when you asked if you wanted me to or not. I was going to wait to come by again until she was better, but the doctors say that she's dying. She can't keep anything down not even water and they said that unless that changes that within a few days she'll be dead."

To say I was shocked at this news was an understatement. Before I was able to comprehend what I was doing I'd said, "Oh Alice, why didn't you tell me, I would have been happy to help you." With that I gave her a hug.

After our little crying fest Alice said, "I don't know what to do Bella. I don't know how you were able to deal with this multiple times first your mother then brother and in a way your father. She's one of my best friends and I can't bare to see it tear my father apart."

I sat in silence not quite sure what I could say to comfort her but eventually settled with saying, "Friends, friends and family Alice. That's how I'm doing it. A piece of me will always mourn them but you have to realize that they want you move on with your life. It's taken me to long to figure that out and you need to know that now. But come on she's not dead yet and there's always a tiny grain of hope until were to that point, so lets go see what we can do to help. Just let me get dressed into something decent and get Carlisle then we can go."

* * *

**Important A/N** I need to know, are people actually reading this? Because it doesn't seem like it, I know it seems like this story is going out on a tangent after tangent but I have a place where I'm going with this and even if it slowly getting there it's still going. All I'm going to ask is that you review. One other thing if I get multiple reviews it'll inspire me to keep going and I'll have a better chance at updating when I get back from my trip other wise I can't say when I'll get a chance to do so. Also I know this chapter doesn't seem important but honestly it is.

Continuing onward I just want you to know I got this chapter out here before I said it would be up and yes my computer isn't working but thankfully my parents were okay with me doing this. I would have made the chapter longer but I'm going out of town tomorrow so yeah.

Becca


	12. Chapter 11

A/N Thanks to littlepinkprincess she gave me an idea for a new title 'Murderous Love' so that will be the new title just so all of you know.

One other thing, I received a review mentioning that they didn't like me prolonging the Edward and Bella troubles with acting childish. I appreciate this person for reviewing and telling me their thoughts. I am sorry about that whole thing I forgot where my plot line was and only recently found it so if I'm correct that should all be mostly done anyway enjoy the chapter. And thanks for all the reviews they made me really happy.

_Recap_

_I sat in silence not quite sure what I could say to comfort her but eventually settled with saying, "Friends, friends and family Alice. That's how I'm doing it. A piece of me will always mourn them but you have to realize that they want you move on with your life. It's taken me to long to figure that out and you need to know that now. But come on she's not dead yet and there's always a tiny grain of hope until were to that point, so lets go see what we can do to help. Just let me get dressed into something decent and get Carlisle then we can go."_

Chapter 11

**One month later - July**

To the horror of Alice and me the first doctor had been right. Her mother died two days after Alice had come to get me.

Every time I saw Alice I could see the pain in her eyes, she did a good job of hiding it but knowing how it felt made it easier to spot. I also knew that it helped to have others there to be with you and so I had made it a point to go and visit Alice.

Another thing that hurt Alice was that her father, like mine, had fallen apart and couldn't be relied upon any longer.

Unfortunately I hadn't been to see Alice for a couple days and so I found my way trekking to her house the moment I had time to.

Normally I told her when I'd be able to come but with this moment of freedom that I hadn't expected I was off.

The roads were muddy from the morning rain and the time it took to get there was twice as long. When I'd reached town I was grateful and quickly hurried as fast as I could to Alice's home. Upon getting there I quickly marched to the door and knocked.

I could here quick scurrying feet on the other side of the door before Alice opened the door slightly. Upon seeing me she opened the door wider then asked, "Bella? What are you doing here? I wasn't expecting to see you for another couple of days."

"And I wasn't expecting to come visit you but I had a spare moment of time and hurried to get here, now won't you invite me in?"

Quickly Alice opened the door wide enough for me to come in and stepped out of the way. When I was in the house I barely heard the click of the door closing. I was in shock of what the house looked like. The inside was a disaster. Looking back over at Alice I saw her avoid my glance and begin picking some books up that were scattered on a table.

Quietly I took the books from her hands, "Let me do that Alice." Taking the books to a shelf I put them in and began to gather up other things.

Alice surprisingly stayed quiet and when I looked back had her head bowed going over to her I asked, "What's wrong Alice?"

Vehemently she shook her head and said, "Nothing"

"I know it's not nothing Alice I've been in this position before Alice, I know that it hurts."

So quietly I'm not sure that she even said anything Alice replied, "no you haven't"

Dismissing the words as my imagination I looked out the window and saw it was getting late, I hadn't realized it had taken me so long to get here. Softly I said, "It's getting late, let me make you some food."

"When I had said the first part of the sentence Alice's eyes had widened with fright and she quickly said, "No Bella you need to go home now I'll be fine just you need to leave before it gets later."

She must have seen the reluctance on my face because she backed herself up with saying, "Esme will be worried."

Knowing she had me there I reluctantly agreed and said before leaving, "Your always welcome with us, I'm sure your father would be alright for a night alone so if you want to get away from here then come over to our place. Okay?"

Alice nodded her understanding then looking out the window, frantically pushed me towards the door saying, "You need to leave now I don't want you on the road when it's dark out."

I nodded looked back at her once and said, "I'll be back when I was planning to before." Then I was gone.

The only thing I could say for sure was that something was going on with Alice that she didn't want me to know about, and as tempted as I was to figure it out I knew I could trust her to tell me when she was ready.

Oh my gosh guys I feel so terrible, I asked if anyone was reading then I didn't update for so long and wow I realize I have all of you reading and I have to say that if there's no one reading anymore I wouldn't blame them. So I don't think this was the greatest chapter but I felt I had to get something to you guys and also I wasn't sure how to get it going. But I hope it wasn't completely bad. Did that make sense? Anyways sorry again and I'll get something out as soon as I can but I'm leaving again next week and I'll be gone for two weeks. But if I have my way then I'll have something out again before I leave. 

Thanks for all the reviews and stuff and once again sorry.

Becca

PS-remember the next time I update the title will be under Murderous Love


	13. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Holy crow guys I feel terrible. I've been so bad at continually updating, can you ever forgive me, heck I did just get back from my trip, but man I knew this but it's finally sinking in that I've been writing this story for at least nine months now and I'm only on chapter 12. Once again sorry and I'll try to better from now on, and I know I've said that a lot but I have been trying…I'll just try harder now. Enjoy the chapter. Just remember its not edited exactly.

_Recap _

_The only thing I could say for sure was that something was going on with Alice that she didn't want me to know about, and as tempted, as I was to figure it out I knew I could trust her to tell me when she was ready._

August

I've now been visiting Alice for a month and every time I go over there my suspicions only grow on the fact that something is amiss.

Taking my last step to the door of my house I opened it and began to make my way down the dirt road.

Breathing deeply I found that it was a beautiful morning day. Flowers bloomed all around me but I hardly took the time to see them.

Finally after I had walked a good chunk of the morning away I could see Alice's house. Briskly I knocked on the door before walking straight in - sure that she wouldn't mind - and to the kitchen where it was apparent Alice had not heard me and was still working on preparing a meal for later.

Deciding to take advantage of this moment of unawareness, I decided to sneak up on her. A small click was heard but I ignored it and tapped Alice on the shoulder. To late I realized that she had been more out of it then I had ever seen her as she turned and the process flinging pasta all over the room and of course on the two of us, and with it came a small yelp from the both of us. Then we were silent before Alice crumpled to the ground and looking all around the room. "Oh great" Following her gaze I saw that pasta really was all over and the floor was covered in a pink sauce. Not sure of what to say I pulled Alice up and grabbed a rag before starting to wipe some sauce up, when I heard a loud base voice, and stomping feet, "Alice you better not have made a mess again or else…" I didn't hear the rest of what was said because when I looked at Alice I saw fear cloud her eyes and then so fast I didn't realize what had been done at first I was under the table and Alice's body covering where I was. When I opened my mouth to protest her foot came back and hit me in the shoulder. It was then I decided to humor her and stay quiet…even if it was because I didn't want her kicking me again.

What I witnessed next would forever chill my bones. Mr. Brandon-whom I had last seen pale and white unable to move from his bed-walked into the room and with foul language that could rival a sailor's shouted at Alice, telling her that she was worthless and clumsy, before going on to say that she was a mistake and many other horrible things. As if that wasn't enough he then slapped, hit and kicked her multiple times before throwing her to the ground and furiously told her to get this cleaned up before he came back. Seconds later I heard the front door slam closed but was to shocked to do anything.

I had known something was going on but I never would have guessed it was this. How long had this been happening? Was Alice's mother really sick, had her father killed her through abuse? But that didn't fit Mr. Brandon had loved his wife and Alice with his whole heart, I had remembered talking to him one day as he had bragged about how he was a lucky man to have his family. He hadn't been lying, I had seen in his eyes that he really loved them; the emotion was so strong that there was no way he could have faked it. So then how had this happened?

A low sob, shook the pieces of the room back into order, and slowly I crawled out from beneath the table to where Alice and crawled into the corner. Slowly I took her small form in my arms and whispered what I hopped were soothing words. Slowly she quieted and finally I looked at her to see a bruise forming on her cheek. Slowly I released her and ordered her to go lie down in her room and get some rest. To tired to argue she did what I asked.

For the next hour or so I wiped up the pasta and sauce before grabbing a few herbs and some vinegar and bringing it up to Alice where I rubbed it into her skin quietly while she slept restlessly. After awhile she sat up straight looking all around and then quickly began to move out of the bed. Not stopping to think I grabbed her arm and pulled her back to the bed. Quickly I let go of her arm when I saw a grimace of pain flash in her eyes.

"I've got to clean up Bella, if he comes back and it's still a mess…how could you just let me fall asleep" Alice's frantic cries danced around the room.

That is until I shushed her with my own words, "Don't worry about it Alice, I already cleaned up the mess. It was my fault anyways. Don't worry about it. Okay?"

Slowly her head moved up and down nodding and that's when I gave her a small smile.

Silence engulfed us once more until I took Alice's hand in mine own and stated without leaving room for an argument. "You're coming home with me Alice. I've left you alone here for far to long now."

All will power had left her as she gave in quickly.

Feeling satisfied I once again gave her the command to lie down and rest after she had packed some things.

While she did this I went down and decided that as much as I didn't want to I would make a meal for Mr. Brandon he had hurt my friend but I wouldn't think of him as I'd seen him today only as the loving father and husband I had known him as.

Within forty minutes-a record on my part-I had a simple dinner made and went up to fetch Alice.

Up in her room I saw that she had taken her most prized possessions and put them in her bag along with some everyday things. Taking her hand I helped her flea from the house she had known as home for so long and continue onward to start over, just like I had.

We arrived to what was now both of our home in the afternoon rain. Drenched we walked into the house where I sought out Carlisle so that he could take a look at Alice and make sure she was fine. Even though she had said she wasn't hurt badly.

Before we made it to Carlisle's office, we ran into Esme who was coming down the stairs at the same time.

"Oh hello Alice, I wasn't expecting to see you today. How are you?" Not waiting for an answer Esme turned to me scolding me slightly, "Bella you should have told me she was coming tonight." Then just as quickly as before she pulled Alice from my arms and taking her to the guest bedroom so that she could get cleaned up and warm to make sure she wouldn't get a cold, while hollering back to me that I'd better do the same. Shrugging to no one in particular I left for my room.

Later that night I took Alice aside.

"Alice I know that you most likely don't want to talk about it, but I need to no, how long has it been going on."

"You don't need to know." Was her firm reply.

Pleading now I looked at her and asked, "Please Alice, tell me, and if not me then at least Carlisle. I want help you."

A moment of silence wrapped us around in arms of steel until Alice took a shuddering breath and said, "Bella, I'll tell Carlisle, because I need to. But I'll tell you because I trust you and believe that you will be there with me."

We spent the next while with her telling me all that she remembered, from her father playing with her as a girl to him gently scolding her when she had done something wrong. How that when her mother had died it had torn her father into miniscule pieces. And so that he could hide from the pain he would get drunk and then after awhile started verbally abusing her before it turned to physical abuse.

All I could think in my mind was that I was glad the man I had known was true but through hurt had taken a wrong turn.

***

September was around the corner now.

Since that fateful day Alice had been living with us, her father had given into Carlisle's prodding quickly. It seemed that he really did love his baby girl still but the alcohol would cloud his thoughts, and that's when he would do something stupid. As of what I knew Carlisle kept an eye on him and was trying to help him quit what he had started.

Esme was sorry about what Alice had gone through, but was ecstatic to have her living with us.

As Alice and I sat around doing some of out studies I heard a happy cry come from Esme, who was sitting in the den. Curiously I looked to Alice before getting up and going to see what it was that was happening.

Esme was holding a piece of paper with a content smile on her face. Reaching over I tapped her shoulder.

"Yes."

"I was wondering what had you so excited."

"Oh nothing you'd probably care much about, how long has it been a month two months, Edward has finally written back."

Smiling at her I nodded and just said I was going to go back and do my studies.

***

For the next month letters from Edward continued to flow into the house until one came asking if a friend and his sister could come on vacation with them, otherwise they would be going home to an empty house, as their parents would be traveling.

Esme hadn't even stopped to think about it just agreed at once that it was okay.

October came with me being newly fifteen leading me to have to try even harder to stay away from all the young boys who would insist on dancing with me. One boy in particular got on my nerves, Michael Newton. Sure he seemed nice enough, but he was extremely boring, and acting like a dog following me everywhere I went. The worst part of it was, was that his parents thought we were a perfect match and Esme and Carlisle insisted it couldn't hurt anything to always have a partner at the formal dinners they insisted on taking Alice and I to now. So grudgingly I gave in and let Mike do this, much to his excitement.

It took one dinner. One dinner for me to decide that I would not be able to do this. At that dinner, I saw Andrew and his parents Mr. and Mrs. Brown again. He was with another girl and that's when the jealously came. Why did I have to be stuck with someone I didn't want to be with while he was laughing with some other girl instead of me? Whoa back up there how much did I like him. I know I thought he was cute, but where was this jealousy coming from I barely knew him. I had talked with him on a few occasions but still.

That night I pulled Mike to the side and blatantly told him, "Mike, it was nice knowing you, but here it is straight out, I don't care for you, and I want you to leave me alone."

When I turned to leave he grabbed my arm and said, "Do you like someone else."

"I might but I don't care for you and that's all there is to it."

With that I walked away glad that he wasn't following me.

_Sorry if anyone seemed OOC, and I hope it didn't seem like I rushed it to much but I'm way behind schedule on where I'm supposed to be on this chapter. Please leave behind helpful criticism I want to become a better writer, and as far as I know that'll help._

_Becca _


	14. Chapter 14

A/N

So sorry for not updating in a long time…I really mean it. My only explanation is that I never had a firm plot figured out and I kept changing what was going to happen so it made it really quite easy to get writers block and therefore harder to update. I realize that most of you have probably lost interest in this story because of my lack of updates but I finally was able to sit down and start getting this plot figured out. It will be the same story only not at all because I actually have a destination in mind this time. Ok I guess what I'm saying is that I have another story that's based off of the first one I did but it will be better.

I will discontinue this story when I put my other one up so be on the lookout for it. I don't know when I'll get it up but when I do I'll have all ready written the next few chapters so it will work as a steady update and I can look ahead in advance.

Once again I really am sorry. ** Be on the lookout **I'll have it up soon.

Becca


	15. Rewrite is NOW UP!

Now Up!!!

Finally after months I have the **Rewrite to this story up** and the next two chapters mostly written. I want to finish this story quickly so that I can move on in my writing life and not feel guilty. Besides I have spent way to much of my time thinking about this story for the past two years to just not finish it. Thankfully this time through I know more of what I want.

Anyways go read the rewrite please. I think that it will be much more enjoyable this time around.

Becca

PS the name is **The Beginnings of all Ends **

(for a little over a day the title was Flickering Afloat, hope it doesn't confuse anyone to much)

And here's the summary: Bella is 15 when her world begins to crumble around her piece by piece. With the struggle of a new life will she discover things better left uncovered? Will she learn secrets about her family? Will they be as innocent as she thought they were? 1700's


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